Throwback Thursdays: True Love Awaits

If you're a faithful reader of Letters From Logan, chances are that you've noticed that I don't write about purity as often as I used to. Why is that?

The answer is slightly complicated. The reason I haven't written about purity much lately is because my standards and opinions have been slowly changing and evolving.

Every single post I have written about purity was written before I ever got into my first real relationship. Abby and I have been dating for over five months now, and with that experience (which, honestly, isn't much) in my pocket, I have been slowly changing the way I look at purity.

At this point, you probably want an example of what I mean. I have long said I am saving my first kiss for my wedding day. That's changed. I kissed Abby a few months ago.

That may not seem like a big deal at all to you, but if you were to read all of my posts in which I say emphatically that I'm waiting until marriage to kiss, you'd probably be raising your eyebrows right now. So why change my standard? The answer to that is simple: I stopped being legalistic about it. I realized I was only saving my first kiss because I thought it make me look good and spiritual, which I guess it did. But my parents had also offered me $5,000 to save my kiss till marriage. No disrespect intended, Mom and Dad, but I think it's legalistic to not kiss my girlfriend for money. I confess it was the big reason I was saving my kiss. And you know what? I haven't felt the slightest tinge of guilt about kissing her. I love kissing her! It's one of the best feelings in the world!

But I do feel a little embarrassed about my attitude about purity. I viewed it with very legalistic eyes. That is why when I look at purity now, I judge it on what the Bible has to say. The Bible says to steer clear from sexual immorality, and to save sex till marriage; it doesn't say to wait till your wedding to lock lips. It's a whole lot simpler than I made it out to be.

So I share this old post with you because it's message is pretty basic: just wait until marriage to have sex. And I want you to understand the simplicity of purity. So many of us stress out about what is right and what is wrong to do before marriage. You know what I think? In a nutshell, you should save sex, and all things sexual relations-related, till marriage. I say that for two main reasons: 1) God says to save it, and 2) you don't want to be burnt out on it when you get married, do you?? The Bible is more than clear that it's wrong to mess around before marriage, and from a logical standpoint, whatever you do before marriage won't be as fun during marriage. So don't waste your fun! It's better to wait and let that anticipation and sexual tension build. Choose to be patient, the first quality of love.

So if you haven't yet, make the commitment to purity! If you think kissing before marriage is wrong, fine. But I challenge you to look at it through simple, Biblical lenses and see what you find. Purity can be really tricky and complicated; don't make it that way.  Follow God and He will guide you. True Love Awaits you if you do.

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Purity has been a popular topic amongst my blogger friends lately. I just read Disturbing View of Purity by LeaningOnHim and was left thoughtful by her unashamed stance on purity and sexual chastity. 

It disturbs me at the shame society places on virginity. Many people look down on virgins. Last summer, I bought a t-shirt that says in big letters on the front "Virginity Rocks", and the back of the shirt says "I'm loving my wife and I haven't even met her yet!" I wore that shirt to school one time, and for weeks people would make comments and ask me about that shirt. It was a bold declaration of my stance on sex. People took note of it and I was known for it. I joked with people that I didn't want to spend money on a purity ring, and a cheap t-shirt would suffice instead.

For some reason, the cliche "True love waits" is inscribed on most purity rings. I like to think about what that saying represents. It obviously states that true love waits for marriage to have sex. That's pretty basic. And it's true. If you really love your future spouse, you won't be sleeping around before marriage. What better way to love your husband or wife by saving yourself sexually for him or her? I won't hold it against my future wife if she has lost her virginity, but it will certainly make me happier and more comfortable if she had saved herself for me.

Why can't the saying be "True love awaits"? In my opinion, true love awaits husband and wife if both have saved themselves for marriage. It isn't that you can't love your spouse if you've lost your virginity, but saving your sexuality for marriage means you've cared about sexual purity your whole life. I'd say that's a very bold statement! So while there is complete redemption and forgiveness those who have squandered their purity away, true love awaits those who purposefully save their bodies until marriage.

Verse of the Week: Colossians 3:15

Colossians 3:15 says,

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful."

This verse has been stuck in my head all day. I read in this morning in my quiet time, and it stood out the most.

Why? Because it touches on two big issues I've been trying to work on lately: peace and gratitude.

I'm a worrier by nature and I tend to go overboard with worry and anxiety when I get stressed out. I struggle with trusting God with big problems in my life and also with my future. So lately I have been focusing on worrying less and trusting Him more.

Colossians 3:15 also stood out to me because of the three word sentence at the end of the verse: "And be thankful."

I'm so guilty of being ungrateful and taking the most precious things in my life for granted. God has been convicting me of this a lot lately. I take so much for granted, and I am trying to learn gratitude and content no matter my situation.

And speaking of taking precious things for granted, I want to end this post with a public apology to my wonderful girlfriend, Abby:

Sweetie, I'm sorry for not being the boyfriend you deserve. You are so wise and mature and patient and fun and beautiful and inspiring!! I have not met anyone as wonderful and amazing and fantastic as you, and I see so much Jesus in you. You treat people in a way I fear I will never be able to, and your patience and wisdom are so incredible. I have learned so much from you, and you inspire me in ways no one else ever has or ever will.

Yet I take you for granted every day. I'm sorry for not being there emotionally for you as much as I should. I'm sorry for being selfish and doing what I want, forgetting to take you into consideration. I'm sorry for not being the man that you deserve. But you can bet I'm working on that. I know I don't deserve you. And I'm so humbled and overjoyed to know you love me enough to put up with my silly foolishness. I love you from the deep depths of my heart, and then some. You are the joy of my life, and I pray that I will have the opportunity to spend it with you! I love you!

"And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." ~Col. 3:17

Throwback Thursdays: Matching Wisdom With Romance

To start off Throwback Thursdays, I want to share a post with you that I wrote almost exactly a year ago. It's called Matching Wisdom With Romance, and in it, I talk about preparing for romance. As you read about about something God revealed to me, look for ways this information could be relevant to your life. There is a little something for everyone in this post. Whether you're single, dating, or married, you need wisdom to lead a life that glorifies and praises God. And that's what this post is all about: wisdom.

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God has been showing me some really cool things. I've been giving romance a lot of thought lately. I'm seventeen, a Senior in high school, already taking dual enrollment classes at the university I will attend after graduation. And I'm really beginning to wonder about the details of my love story. Of course, this is nothing new. I vented fully to my obsession with love in my post A Hopeless, Foolish Romantic. I'm a sucker for romance, so naturally, my own romance is of particular interest to me. And I'm now at the age where a lot of people often meet their spouse of begin to fall in love. My mom was eighteen and my dad was nineteen when they were wed. And many of my friends' parents were married in their late-teens to early-twenties.

I opened Boy Meets Girl by Joshua Harris again earlier this week. I love getting lost in the love stories he talks about. Those stories, and the wisdom Harris guides me to, are what keep me going when I get lonely. I read of such wonderful, Godly love that I can't help but dream of how my story will play out. And I by no means think it's wrong or a waste of time to do so. If I give my future marriage no thought, no hope, no planning now, it would never succeed. And so I've been taking it to God. I've been talking to God about it. And believe it or not...

God talked back.

I had been asking questions like, "God; when will I meet her?" and "Who is she?" and "When is your timing, God?" And God answered me. He didn't answer me directly, but Jesus hardly ever answered questions directly in His time on earth. Instead, this is how He talked to me: A few nights ago, I was sitting in my room praying for my future wife. I was asking God the same questions I mentioned just a few sentences ago. And out of nowhere, I had this sudden desire to read Boy Meets Girl. As I picked up the book, still unsure of what exactly to read, believe it or not, a voice in my head whispered that I should read page forty-eight. So what is on page forty-eight? The headline of the page is "Are You Ready for Courtship?" Cue the goosebumps. You bet God had my full attention. The page talked about matching wisdom with romance. Harris used the kite-and-string analogy to show how romance (the kite) always nosedives without wisdom the string). I took a mental note: If I want to get married, I'll need to be wiser first. But that isn't what shook me to my core. Right after the part about wisdom, Harris writes, "I talked to many couples... who ask, 'How do we know when it's the right time to start a courtship?' The basic answer to the question is that you're ready to start a courtship when you can match wisdom with romance." How incredible is that?! God showed me what I need to work on, and He encouraged me to stay strong in His name. I could hear Him saying, "You're so close. Don't give up now. I have a plan for you. It's a wonderful plan! And I can't wait for you to see it play out. But in order for that you happen, I need to you get ready. I need you to prepare. Because in order for Me to give away one of my daughters to you in a covenant of marriage, I'm going to need to see you prove yourself. To start, here is what I need you to work on: wisdom."

That was Wednesday. And God's been doing a lot of work in my heart since then. I've realized that I'm no longer itching to be in a relationship. In fact, I'll go even further to say that I know that right now isn't His timing. I know I'm not ready right now. It's still something I want really bad, and I get lonely a lot, but it's no longer an idol. I'm ready to follow Him and serve Him, even if He wants me to wait for ten years, or twenty years, or however many years. Luckily, I don't feel God calling me to wait that long, nor do I feel him calling me to a life of celibacy. I completely believe He has a Godly young lady out there for me, and that we will be united in marriage sooner than later. And I believe that in order for me to match romance with wisdom, I need to level up in wisdom. I've decided to study Proverbs. Where else would a guy look for wisdom? Proverbs oozes Godly wisdom and understanding. I believe God has commissioned me to seek His wisdom.

I believe there is a list of Godly characteristics every man should have before getting married. I'm still working on that list, but wisdom is definitely near the top, if not the top, of the list. If you please, pray for me in my path to wisdom. And please pray for Baby Justice and for Mrs. Karla (click here).

Mondays And Thursdays Just Got Better...

Tomorrow will mark the start of something new here on Letters From Logan: Throwback Thursdays. Every Thursday for the next four weeks, I will post an old post that I wrote a long time ago. Each post will somehow be themed on love. Why? Because I am working on a new post series that highlights each quality of love as described in 1 Corinthians 13.

So I will take the next several weeks to prepare for and begin writing that series. Until that series debuts in early November, I hope you will enjoy reading some older posts written quite a while ago. I think you will find it interesting to read some of my old work, and maybe if you're a long-time reader, you'll be reading these posts for the second time. Whatever the case may be, I certainly can't wait to get to work on this new series on love, and in the meantime, I hope you will enjoy Throwback Thursdays!

ALSO...

I'm sure you lead a very busy life, especially with the holidays fast approaching and with school in full session, and I know it can be hard to sit down and read my posts. I understand that you really don't have the time right now to read every one of my posts, and to be honest, I don't often have the time to write them. I'm a full-time college student with a girlfriend and a part-time job, so I understand that life is busy. My posts tend to be serious and long, and while I enjoy blogging with that style of writing, I know that it can be hard to read (and sometimes hard to write).

That is why I am also going to start posting a Verse Of The Week on Mondays. These posts will be short and to the point. I'll just pick a verse and talk a little bit about it. It will be simple and quick to read, but I hope it will make an impression that lasts at least a week in your life.

Thank you so much for reading and giving me your time. I'm truly humbled and excited by knowing you take the time out of your busy schedule to read! I hope you will stay a faithful reader, and maybe you'll even consider leaving a comment on a post every once and a while to offer your feedback. There's nothing quite as exciting as an encouraging comment, and I'm even glad to get a critical comment! Rest assured that I really appreciate every comment left, even if it's a negative one. I simply like knowing that someone out there is reading.

So thank you again for your time and for reading! I hope and pray that this blog continues to bless you, encourage you, or make you think.

"If God is for us, who can be against us?" ~Romans 8:31