There's a specific time in everyone's life where they have an exclusive opportunity to serve God without restraint. These years are set aside as a time of serving, of learning, of growing. Those who use their time wisely during these years grow up ready for life. Those who squander their time become lazy, weak, and unskilled. Needless to say, these years can be some of the best. But they can also become of the loneliest and most confusing. Ah, the single years. Gotta love em! Or maybe not...
The Harris brothers are pretty big on not wasting time. Bret and Alex wrote two books just on doing hard things! And Josh loves to write about how to use your single years as preparation for life and marriage. When I read their books two years ago, I agreed that dating would be a pretty big waste of time. I didn't see much value or return for my work in the dating scene. Actually, I saw drama, pain, temptation, and distractions more than anything. There's one teenage couple I know who've dated for just over two years. All the other couples I've seen get together and disband only lasted a few months at the most.
Dating is temporary and ineffective, at least in the teen years. I've also seen more pain, whining, and drama on Facebook because of dating than any other issue. Broken relationships leave awkward friendships, broken hearts, bitter enemies. Of course, the temptation is much higher in a relationship, as well.
The one that got me, more than the other three, was the distraction. My mind is wired to focus intensely on one thing. The times when I focus too much on a crush or get a girlfriend, life becomes less and less on God. My focus becomes on the girl, and God gets pushed to the back burner.
I'm a really romantic guy. I love love movies. Yes, I love the Notebook, Sense and Sensibility, the Princess Diaries, A Cinderella Story, Another Cinderella Story, Beauty and the Beast, and all the other greats! That's what's so hard to grasp. I love romance, and would give my right arm to fall in love. But I just don't have room in my heart yet for a woman and my God. I don't know how to fit both in. So I choose only God. And while that may sound degrading of my view of God, it's not! God created man and woman to fall in love and have kids and live our lives together. I just struggle with loving two things that much and keeping my primary focus on God and not her.
So for now, I'm stuck in the dreadful "single years". Que dramatic, creepy piano. But it's not as bad as it seems. Being single has hundreds of benefits I'm sure I'll miss when I'm married. It stinks to feel lonely all the time. It'd be nice to have a pretty little lady be head over heals for me. But one thing I know for sure is I don't want to waste these single years. I might as well make use of these years by doing things only single people can do!